Episode 169
<-- Previous Episode | [[Episode 170|Next Episode -->]] Length: 2:36:27 Hosts: Alex Kate Matt Mitch Guests: Intro: None Closing Song: ? ---- Content Covered: *Behind the Scenes of Banners *Mortal Kombat *New streetpass games Notable Facts: *Detroit somehow became Rape City *Matt 4 GB Kate tiny 2GB videocard Funny Stories and Quotes Alex *Riki Tiki Tembo **Mitch - When did my dad become Japanese? **Alex - Mitcharu, come sit down and enjoy spaghetti. Space Tobaccoeru. *I was looking up comic book porn for a joke. **Matt - Yeah right. **Alex That was after, but before I was looking up comic book porn for a joke. **Matt - And then I came on Fozzy. *Jane from Tarzan is masturbating with bananas in 40 to 50 different poses. **Matt - Still hot. **Alex - NO! *The Jews *Mitch you are a literal retard. *I am not good at this version of Mortal Kombat. No one understands me. *Mortal Kombat, it's good. **Kate -So it's in the meta data. *Will Smith is in Suicide Squad? **Matt - What does Killer Croc look like? **Alex - A black guy with scales. **Mitch - This looks like a cosplay meetup. **Alex - Looks like a cosplay meetup and they got to hang out with Will Smith. *Frank Miller not Alan Moore. I'm sorry, that's the most offensive thing I said on the show. **Kate - Nigger, kikes, and wops. End the show. forever. **Alex - So this is the segment for Kate to do her GamerGate Quiz? **Kate - I did but got distracted due to bomb threats. **Alex - You had an extra week! **Kate - You know how I roll in last second. **Alex - But you didn't. (BURNED KATE BURNED) *I hope Superman vs. Batman is an origin story of both characters. *Anyone videogames? **Matt - Streetpass is for faggots. It's for baby nerds. Fucking Mitch, what a homo, everyone plays streetpass. **Alex - Mitch is disappointed for being himself. **Matt Reminds me (starts talking like Bookfart) *Ugh. Well new streetpass games are pretty fun. Flowertown sounds stupid but if you like collecting, it's amazing. Fishing is good. I want to make the biggest tank and fill it with actual garbage. The zombie game is an actual game. It's weird to actually play a Streetpass game and not speed through the menu. *I was at a Japanese festival. They sold Dragonball Z incense. **Matt - Awful. **Mitch - How many fat white girls with Naruto headbands? **Alex - A lot. There was one tent selling petroleum. Rickshaws don't run on petroleum. **Alex - My friend said this place would be so crowded if it wasn't for Pearl Harbor and I had a laugh. *I saw a cosplay of an anime girl I also saw at PAX. *Let me drink milk while taking off a shirt. **Mitch - What we need for a break through is Matt drinking milk while taking a shirt off. Do it in your balcony you rich white piece of shit. **Matt - Yes my luxurious suite. **Alex - Film a giant mess but it's so far away you can't tell what's going on. **Matt - Christina! What the fuck are you doing? I'm the fucking director not you! I took a megaphone and put her head inside it and yelled. *Why is the show fun? **Kate - No it isn't. **Alex - Shut up. **Kate - No you. **Alex - Shut the fuck up. **Kate - You stupid bearded dick man. **Alex - Have you ever considered shutting the fuck up? *I feel like the show is winding down. **Matt - I feel that everytime before we record. **Mitch - The Japanese are a bunch of faggots. **Matt - Stealing my headstone "Nothing will last forever". *Sam Raimi shitting the bed. *(amibos) Life doesn't matter. If someone tells me this doesn't matter then nothing matters. *Someone will be stabbed by a Rosalina. *Stop chewing on your pizza loud! **Kate - No! (CHEWS LOUDER) **Matt - Don't ask us if you're not listening fuckface. **Kate - Fuckface! (KEEPS CHEWING AS A FAT FUCK) *Donate $50,000 so you can contribute to the show. *Complete fucking garbage cannot be the joke all the time. **Matt - We're running out of ideas and we want to die. *I feel this is the last episode. I don't think we can do anymore. We're running out of the ability to talk about nothing. If you have any ideas about nothing send us nothing. **Matt - Send $50,000 to offshore banking account. **Alex - Our Swiss Patreon. Kate *I saw the Pixels trailer and it made me want to die even more. **Matt - Why Kevin James? **Kate - Just why? *My mom visited me. I didn't want to see Ultron opening night. She said her husband and son forced her to watch Paul Blart 2 so shut the fuck up. She stopped me in my tracks. She's right. *I hate Ultron. *You fucking faggots. 90's gamers are throwing cash at nostalgia. (Yooka Laylee) **Mitch - It's full or Rare Easter Eggs. **Alex - That must be hard to find. *Not everything is about Mortal Kombat. **Alex - So I was playing Mortal Kombat. **Kate - Were you parkouring in the rain? **Matt - Was it Rape City? **Alex - No Rape Realm. **Matt - That isn't funny. **Alex - Unless its rape. **Alex and Matt proceed to laugh at the joke *Mitch is a fuck up. *Mitch you fucker. I haven't ate cereal in a while. *Mitch you're a fucking idiot and I can't believe you said it. **Matt - I didn't live a priviledge life like you Mitch you fucking Jew. *Seth McFarlene has 4 voices. **Alex and Matt same time - He only does 2. **Matt - The black guy does all the voices. **Kate - Nigger. *Wait until the retard comments at the end. **Alex - Kate you stupid fuck retard. *You know what Mitch. I wish you could be happy. Sometimes you get on your man period and you are such a little quief. **Matt - WHAT'S GOING TO MAKE YOU HAPPY MITCH? YOU'RE HALFWAY THERE WITH YOUR ANIME GIRLFRIEND KATE I MEAN MITCH **Mitch - Who is the subject of the conversation? **Matt - I was talking so it's about me. *Whomp is depressingly accurate about my life. **Matt - He's a physical manifestation of our sadness. **Kate - Not you Alex, you have a good life. **Alex - No I want to suck with you guys. 169! **Matt - 169 episodes Jesus Christ. **Alex - We are going to 200! *Oh my god, my pizza is in the oven. *I hate women. **Matt - I know. *I'll buy the 10 out of 10 edition. *No more preorders no more kickstarters, no more early access, and no more day one. Matt *I liked that every childrens book was based in racial stereotypes. *Alex forgives the Japanese. *Kevin James wouldn't have a career if Chris Fairley didn't die. **Alex - He's the retarded cousin that always kept coming to rehersal. **Matt - It's not a joke. He's a fat shit. **Kate - It helps not to be Kevin James. *Breaking News. do.do.do.do Christina handed me a not that the cat threw up on the floor. *Where are you from? Rape City **Alex - I live in the nice part of Rape City. *I have a 4GB videocard. I don't know what it means. So many graphics. **Alex - Did you install Pixels? **Matt - I called Geek Squad to tighten the graphics on level 6. *Fuck Warner Brothers ID. I don't look at videogame news anymore. *The Title of this episode is Rape City so it can be. **Kate - It will be to spite you. **Matt - To spite me? **Kate - Now you won't fuckface. **Alex - It will be called Rape City and Now it Won't. **Kate - It will be Rape City in the Meta Data. *Mario I did the thing no fuck. *Monster Bag is that a game about Scrotum? **Alex - lol, that tickled me in the monster bag. **Matt - That's a new goosebumps series. It intersects with Monster Cum. **Kate - 1st Goosebumps in the 2000's was edgy. *Streets of Rage 2 is nearly the perfect game for me. *Wolf Cop is really stupid. It's not fun stupid. However it's a movie I would make if I "had friends". *I'm really funny. I agree. **Kate - It's Alex job to save us from funny jokes. **Alex - I am the only funny. *Kung Fury has been my life for the past year and a half. *I put Lonely Gods on youtube and we get no views for 2 weeks. *Nothing will surpass the hatred for myself. I hated Man of Steel, and no one likes Spiderman 2. **Kate - Dark Knight Rises is a piece of fucking garbage. **Matt - Gives up being Spiderman because he's a pussy. Topher Grace should have been Spiderman **Kate - Wilder Valderamma should have been Spiderman. Where the fuck, he must have came from somewhere. *Warner Brothers can suck a dick. **Mitch - Put easy fatality tokens in. No, but just do it though. *Patreon donors I assume they are all children. I don't know why. **Mitch - This just in DLC, and Patreon crashes the world economy. **Matt - That's the psychology of the gamer we should be studying. Why they're violent is bullshit. Whether they're stupid and dumber than a bag of fucking rocks with enough money to throw at people. *(videogames) I wish they didn't make it harder to like what I already like. **Kate - Videogames, the shit is fucked. Sometimes Nintendo is the only ones with their head straight. I would have never said that last gen. **Matt - KILL RETAILERS *When will we talk about Ping Pong Club you fag. I was watching it on a "legal" Chinese website. *Korra is waifu for life for Le Tran with Wii Fit Trainer. Mitch *The Chinese kid who fell in the well, but his name was too long they couldn't rescue him. **Kate - I hate Chinese people. *I'm Kate, one time I peed in a sock. **Alex - One time I put my dick in a dick. **Kate - I did though. **Mitch - One time I was on an airplane and there was no barf bag so I threw up in my shoes and then I wore them. **Alex - And I play it on my dick so it was warm and chunky. **Mitch - There's a convent of mice living in my anus. **Matt - Church mice? **Kate - It brings them closer to god. *Nintendo raped my 3DS. I found the hard Streetpass limit on games. *The F-16 Tomcat. (Wrong F-14 Tomcat, F-16 Falcon) *Yu Suzuki is a secret American. **Matt - I'll never forgive the Americans. *Yu Suzuki is the definition of rad. He died driving a Testorossa into the sun with a blonde chick. *(Corrected Matt) You ride a T-Rex, they are called Blood Dragons. *You had a dream about my girlfriend? **Alex - Yeah **Mitch - How many PS4 controllers did you drop in her ass? **Alex - I was a gentlemen and I put them in her vagina. **Mitch - It's too small. **Alex - Second, it was a PS3. **Mitch - It was MADCATZ. *I said the big Xbox controller has a giant X that does nothing and takes up space and she said just like your dick. **Matt - Terrible **Mitch - So what was the dream? **Alex - I gave her Xbox controllers. **Matt - No it's true! **Alex - What I do remember telling Kori was not to break up with Mitch cause he's a shitty whiny bitchy baby asshole when he isn't gratified and doesn't feel human enough for a girl to talk to. **Mitch ....That's true. *I dreamed of Wal-luigi amiibos. **Matt - I never dream because my life is a never ending nightmare, but when I do dream, it's Christina having a penis which isn't so, so I woke up sad. That isn't real. (Catfood) *They had that one song about good to have a large friend so they can shove people out of the buffett. **Matt - That's so true! *I wanna be the guy where my girlfriend would actually love me. <-- Previous Episode | [[Episode 170|Next Episode -->]] Category:Episode Category:Alex Category:Matt Category:Mitch Category:Kate